


Lost in a World of Non-Believers

by Ash_Cassidy97



Series: This is Your Heart [3]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Character study of the Force, Hurt/Comfort, Jedi, Jedi Code, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-12
Updated: 2016-03-12
Packaged: 2018-05-26 07:17:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,408
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6228904
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ash_Cassidy97/pseuds/Ash_Cassidy97
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Luke said he wouldn’t teach her.</p>
<p>And she was out of fucks to give.</p>
<p>To her, the Force felt like family.</p>
<p>This girl who’d been abandoned on a desert planet and left to find her own bitter path. She had a way now to feel Poe and Finn from a universe away. And all Luke could warn her was not to have attachments.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Lost in a World of Non-Believers

Luke said he wouldn’t teach her.

 

And she was out of fucks to give.

 

To her, the Force felt like family.

 

This girl who’d been abandoned on a desert planet and left to find her own bitter path. She had a way now to feel Poe and Finn from a universe away. And all Luke could warn her was not to have attachments.

 

To Luke, the Force had felt like adventure, when he was a moisture farmer on a desert planet. He brought moisture down from the heavens and sold it. His father was Darth Vader and his nephew was Kylo Ren. The Force no longer felt like adventure.

 

And Rey didn’t care-couldn’t care. She had what she’d been given. She had friends and a staff on her back. If Luke didn’t want her, then she would find another way. She was through bargaining her life away to a “higher” being.

 

If asked, Annie Skywalker would’ve said that the Force felt like racing, like sand whipping past, and his mother standing at the finished line; it felt like  _ hope _ . This was a boy who’d raced to free himself, to help others because he could sense them so strongly. He was cocky as hell but he was a  _ boy _ .

 

The Jedi told him to have no attachments and then gave a boy, who was so unashamed of himself, power. What did they think would happen? The boy said, “fine, then I won’t be a fucking Jedi because my wife is in danger and you won’t help”. Damn him for that, I dare you.

 

Darth Vader would say that it felt like power and Anakin Skywalker at the very end would say that it felt like personal salvation.

 

“Fine,” Rey told Luke on that mountain top. She had faced Kylo Ren in a snowy wood. That wasn’t snow though, it was ashes. She had flown with Han Solo and Chewbacca. Don’t say that she was unafraid, she was kind. And Luke had a sharp edge to his tongue now and Rey had a lightsaber in her weathered hands and a staff bumping against her hip.

 

If you had asked Obi-Wan what he thought about the Force, his views hadn’t changed. He would say that it is peace, peace with a war-like edge if you forced it, but peace nevertheless. To use the Force, you felt at peace, at home. Obi-Wan had a  _ home _ .

 

And Rey was out of shits to give.

 

Luke followed her off that island because he was still a Jedi and now, his sister knew where he lived. He was wise enough to avoid a girl who would tear strips of skin off of him, an R2 unit who really really wanted to shock him, and a Wookie with a crossbow.

 

“You don’t need to be a Jedi,” Finn said when they had gotten back. He’d woken up to Poe. He’d woken up from the First Order.

 

“I know,” Rey said. She fiddled with a spare part of the  _ Falcon _ . Poe grimaced and felt useless next to them. He was good with people but he’d never started out as broken as they had (he’d been broken but give him his denial for a while at least).

 

“You are not a spare part and fuck Skywalker,” Poe said firmly.

 

“I want to learn. I have this power, to help people,” she said wistfully. “I’ve never been able to help people before.”

 

“So, help people,” Finn said simply. “I’ll show you some defense moves tomorrow.” Rey nodded.

 

Finn trained Rey in self-defense to the point where she could kick his ass. She didn’t have a Jedi Master but she had an ex-stormtrooper and a staff. She knew which she prefered.

 

Poe kept his mouth shut. He had a family when he was younger. One of his best friends had torn through his mind and while he hated that Luke hurt Rey, he understood. Finn was good, kind and dangerous in the same way that Leia was, but Poe knew people. He knew that Snoke wasn’t always friendly. He knew that half of his squad would pile onto Jess’s room on bad nights. He knew what a nightmare looked like and it was funny how easily he saw through a Jedi Master.

 

Poe kept his mouth shut and tracked down the R2 unit. “Where?” he asked.

 

“Beep, Beeeep, Bep.”

 

“Thank you.” Poe tracked Luke down to a spare storage room in the basement of the base. He was sitting cross-legged, hands on his lap, palms up. Poe knocked on the wall.

 

“Come in,” Skywalker said.

 

“Why aren’t you going to train Rey?” Skywalker opened his mouth. “No, the real reason.”

 

“I can’t be responsible for her turning dark.”

 

Poe laughed sharply. He had his feet in the sky most days and he had more of a mind than a man grounded in his own failure.

 

“I knew him,” Poe started slowly, building his argument. “No, I  _ knew  _ him. We were both these kids of legends. My mom was this brilliant pilot. Everybody thought I was going to be just like her. And Ben  _ knew  _ that he was going to be this famous Jedi, who would help people. 

 

But my mom died. She died and Ben never understood that. He never felt pain. He never had to watch others fall to the Darkside, be tempted. And my mom had died and he left for an island. His parents sent him away and none of you knew how to talk him back then, don’t you see? Vader brought himself back.

 

You can’t help those who don’t want help, Skywalker.”

 

“I could break her.”

 

Poe chuckled lightly. “Honestly, I’d be more worried that she’d break you.” He met the man’s eyes squarely. “You’re running away from your duties, Jedi. People are dying. So stop acting like a dick.”

 

Luke stood up, graceful for his age. He started to say something but the ground shook and they were both blown backwards.

 

Poe could hear rubble falling from the ceiling outside their room. Poe ran out, darting through the crowd. Luke was a step behind him, blaster in hand.

 

“What?” Poe yelled, snatching a nearby soldier.

 

“Ceiling caved in the hanger,” she yelled back.

 

Poe ran flat out. Rey had been working on the  _ Falcon _ .

 

People were screaming, running the other direct as Poe and Luke shoved through the crowd. The ground lurched once more and the ceiling shook again. Luke grabbed Poe’s shoulder.

 

“It’s going to cave again!” Luke screamed, making himself heard against the background noise. “Get everybody else clear!” Poe shook his head. “I will get Rey out, I promise.”

 

Poe nodded once and shoved off in the other direction.

 

Luke ran into the what remained of the hanger bay and skidded to a stop. The ceiling was falling and Rey was in the center of it.

 

Her hands were held above her head, hands spread outward. Her eyes were closed. She was the only thing preventing the whole building from falling apart. There was blood dripping from her nose.

 

Luke ran to her and wrapped the Force around the both of them, raising the ceiling back into place. Rey collapsed at his feet. He fixed the walls in place with his mind and scooped up the scavenger into his arms. The walls kept rumbling but everybody was a good fifty feet out from the impact zone, the Force told the man. It grumbled at the man for being a stubborn asshole.

 

He walked out of a war zone, holding the goddamn heavens where they were supposed to be. Rey was shaking and that blood on her face was such a bright color. He was in a war zone.

 

Luke let the building collapse in his wake, trying to control the fall so it didn’t set off  a chain reaction.

 

“Is-” Rey coughed hard. “Is everybody-” she coughed again.

 

“Everybody’s safe. Go to sleep.” She fell asleep. He took her to a spare corner and balanced her in his lap. Medical would be packed with more serious injuries than a moronic padawan.

 

“Will she be okay?” Poe asked, pulling up a chair beside the Jedi.

 

“I don’t know.”

 

“You over your little emo moment?” Luke rolled his eyes. Poe smirked. “Good.”

 

“What did he do to you, if I may ask?” Luke asked carefully, keeping his eyes fixed on Rey.

 

“Tortured me. My best friend tortured me.” Poe was too tired to be bitter anymore.

 

“I’m sorry-”

 

“No, Master Jedi. Stop apologizing for your apprentice. He’s nearly thirty. He can make his own damn decisions. I don’t care if Snoke is brainwashing him even. He chose to rip through my mind.”

 

“I’m sorry.” Poe rolled his eyes. “No, I felt your fear when I reached for the Force.”

 

“Doesn’t matter. Rey is my friend. She’s Finn’s friend.”

 

“Hmmm,” the Jedi remarked thoughtfully.

 

“Still don’t like you.”

 

“I know.”

Rey woke abruptly, falling off the bed.

 

Hands caught at her and she fell anyways.

 

“Easy,” a voice murmured. “It’s alright. That’s it.” Hands scooped her back onto the bed.

 

Her memories rushed back. “Is everybody safe?”

 

“Yes,” Luke answered, keeping a hand on her shoulder in case she fell again. 

 

“I can’t-I’m fine, I can work,” she said hastily, trying to lurch out of the bed.

 

“Easy,” Luke murmured, keeping her under the covers. “It’s alright. Nobody’s asking you to work right now.  _ Easy _ .”

 

“No, really, I’ve worked when I’ve felt much worse than this,” she assured the Jedi.

 

“That’s-really good but seriously, just rest for right now and let the medics do their work.”

 

Rey, contrary to a point, tried to roll away once more. “Medics?”

 

“Yes?” Luke already dreaded her response. He had a new appreciation for Poe because the man didn’t just gut him for being a selfish bastard.

 

“I can’t afford them!” She cried in alarm.

 

“They’re paid hourly by Resistance funds. You’re Resistance, you get help when you are hurt, especially since you helped other Resistance,” Luke explained patiently. Luke waived his metal hand in front of her. “I got this chopped off because of my father. I was fighting for the Rebellion and therefore they made sure that it was fixed.”

 

“Yes, but you’re a  _ Jedi _ .”

 

Luke grinned. “I wasn’t always. Back then, I was an idiot.” He was still an idiot, just a more informed idiot.

 

One of the medical staff entered the small patient room.

 

“I can’t-” Rey leaned away from the person.

 

“I’m Tum,” the man said cheerfully. “I just want to check those bacta patches. Master Luke, if you mind?”   
  


The Jedi turned to leave but Rey caught his hand. She didn’t say anything but Luke could see the fear in her eyes.

 

“Is it alright if I stay?” Luke asked carefully. Rey nodded.

 

“Please.”

 

Tum gingerly injected the woman with a needle. “For the pain. You should be able to walk around by tomorrow. Whatever you did caused cerebral internal bleeding. The best you can do is sleep.”

 

“I have to work,” Rey protested, looking at Luke.

 

“No. You’re injured. It’s alright.” He tried to smile. It came out as a grimace. “It’s fine. Really.”

 

“You should go help other people then.”

 

“I’m helping you right now, or at least I hope I am. Most of the other injured or trapped have already been helped. A lot of people are very grateful to you.” He hesitated. “I am grateful for your help.”

 

“I-You’re welcome.”

 

She sounded the same way that Han had sounded when he’d been thanked by a small child on Yavin 4. She was not used to kindness and she hadn’t learned bravado. Luke was marked by scars of a first war and the beginning of another one. He would not let a child venture into war again unarmed.

 

“I am not the one to teach you,” Luke said slowly, carefully, checking his words for any faultline to the Darkside. “I taught Kylo Ren. I am not the one to teach you.”

 

“I know,” Rey said back. Her words were weighted. She had lived in isolation, like Luke, but she had not chosen it. Note the difference. “But you are the only one who can.”

 

“Hmm. I am not the Master you seek.”

 

“I found a map to you anyway.” She blinked widely at him. “Odd how it slotted into place. The  _ Falcon _ , Poe, Finn, Han, all of it.”

 

She’d been up against much harder before.

 

Luke sighed heavily. He couldn’t deny that it was either the Force or somebody else was writing a very crappy ending for all of them.

 

“I will train you.” Rey nodded. “But first, you need to rest.”

 

Rey did get trained by Luke because they were both Jedi now. Luke thought that Rey was Jedi before she even met him.

 

Rey got trained by a lot of people in those weeks.

 

Leia taught her to laugh, smile, and count cards. Leia had been a bad influence on Han. Poe taught her to pay off her debts, but that it was okay to have some. And Finn . . .Finn taught her that you could be a kindness even after all the bullshit.

 

She still cleaned the mats with Finn every morning before breakfast because she was a true friend. She still slept on the ground but she piled into Jess’s room on bad nights because that woman made the best tea. She still held Poe’s hand when he was scared and mumbling. She still sat next to Leia when the General couldn’t be a General for a moment.

 

There’s a lesson in all of this.

 

Rey wasn’t a Jedi because she picked up a lightsaber, held by Luke Skywalker.

 

Rey broke a mountain apart because she couldn't kill Kylo Ren and come home. Not right then, anyway. And here’s the important part: she wanted to but didn’t. She wanted to leave but she came back because it was the right thing to do.

 

The Force, if you bothered to ask it, wouldn’t answer. It is not responsible for your actions. It just  _ is _ .

 

Qui-Gon would say that it is life. Yoda would say that it is everything. Poe would say that it could damn you or destroy you. Finn would stare at you and say to go ask Poe. Leia-well, that’s another story, isn’t it.

 

But that all doesn’t really matter.

 

Jedi create themselves. The Force just  _ is. _

  
What are you going to do with it?

**Author's Note:**

> title from Kings by Tribe society. Poe is my favorite. Still mad about Force Awakens. This is my attempt at being nice to Luke. Fail!Jedi that he is.


End file.
